How Can You Be a Functional Family?

Instead of trying to be the “best,” focus on teaching your kids life skills they can use to become helpful members of the family. A big trap in modern parenting is the pressure of competition. Who can make the cutest birthday cupcakes? Which parent can get to the most soccer games?

When you’re dealing with parenting your kids and caring for an aging parent, you definitely don’t have time for this nonsense. Instead of trying to be the “best,” focus on teaching your kids life skills they can use to become helpful members of the family. Even preschoolers can do some chores if you choose age-appropriate tasks. As kids work on mastering their assigned tasks, they’ll gain valuable skills and self-confidence, and you’ll get some breathing room when the family’s work is more evenly distributed.

Birth to Age 2

OK, so there aren’t many chores an infant can do. Still, it’s never too early to get in the habit of having your child watch you do chores as you talk through the steps. Invest in a great carrier and try some babywearing while you do laundry, empty the dishwasher, or run the vacuum. Toddlers can follow you around the house to watch you work. Be sure to answer all their questions and don’t drop everything the moment they want to do something else; instead, set the stage for understanding delayed gratification and the importance of completing a task.

Preschoolers

Kids in this age group may still struggle with fine motor skills, but they can handle large objects easily. They are also learning to sort things into categories and detect patterns, so take advantage by teaching them to do the following household chores:

Elementary Schoolers

Once kids get to school, they are curious about how things work, especially machines. They’re also learning to follow more complex, multi-step directions. You can break down directions into single steps with pictures for more complex chores if necessary, but most school-age children are ready for the following chores:

Tweens and Teens

By the time your kids reach middle and high school, they’re ready to take on just about anything that needs to be done around the house if you’ve taught them well along the way. Allowing older kids choices by letting them do the chores they like (or at least the ones they don’t hate) can help defuse angst-driven rebellion issues, and you can always tie the chores to an allowance as a reward. Many teens thrive when given room to show responsibility and creativity. Here are some ideas:

Raising kids to be responsible, competent members of the family isn’t just about getting some help around the house. Giving them responsibility teaches them the importance of a family working together and shows them that everyone has something to contribute. The result will be a fully functional family that works together — leaving more time to play together.

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